271: Learn Your Insecurities So You Can Avoid Being A Douche

This past week I was at the Traffic and Conversion Conference. I spent the week catching up with friends, and meeting new ones. I was surrounded by internet marketers, entrepreneurs, and a plethora of innovators. One day, during the conference, I was talking to a few new people I had not previously met. While in conversation, I found myself starting to brag about my latest ventures with my company. Furthermore, I found myself throwing out monetary numbers in regards to the growth of my business.

I dislike it immensely when people name drop, or quote their yearly salary, yet there I was, doing the exact same thing. What I realized really quickly was that I was dropping numbers to make up for the insecurities I was feeling while at this conference. I was surrounded by people making ten times more than I was, yet I felt the need to broadcast my success.

Do you ever feel like you are trying to big-note yourself to gain the respect from others? Do you try to undermine your abilities and successes for praise? Does this stem from an insecurity? And are you aware of such insecurity? On this episode of the James Swanwick show, James explains how insecurities can cause us to exploit the things we hold the most disdain for, while instilling even more insecurities within.

Key Takeaways

  • Deliberately and strategically telling people about my new business instead of waiting for it to come up in conversation.
  • This came from insecurity in my own personality.
  • I was, and I am, insecure.
  • The Australian culture is very much against showboating, opposed to the United States
  • I have always struggled with finding a happy balance between sharing your story / success and boasting about your career.
  • If I was secure, I would have been present in the moment, and not just fixated on what these people thought of me.
  • I was so eager for respect from them, and that is a weak part of my personality.
  • Why did I not feel enough?
  • Even though this was a downside to the conference, it is a moment for growth potential.
  • Being transparent with this, forces me to grow uncomfortable. Learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable will force you to grow in your character.
  • How can I talk about the growth of my business without posting financial numbers? Easy- simply talk about the growth in units.
  • Why have you tried to impress others before with numbers? What does this mean for you? Let me know your thoughts.
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